LifePedia | By Anand Sharma
There are many a raging debate to have plagued mankind across the globe, be it over the greatest footballer of all time – Maradona or Pele or the debate between the best screen pair- Kate Winslet/ Leonardo DiCaprio or Ingrid Bergman/Humphrey Boggart. And then possibly the greatest of them all–the unpredictable hills or the mysterious seas, the most sought-after romantic spot.
Thankfully, love knows no such debates and women choose all the time. But should they win always? No matter what happens, men, always end up getting dragged to the cinema halls to watch stupid mushy romantic movies often at the cost of a T20 blockbuster with friends and cheap and chilled beer at home. But have you ever noticed that things actually get worse when we plan a vacation with our women.
The number of things that can’t go wrong go wrong. I mean how can you possibly miss the flight because of those three dozen selfies dubbed as the ‘last-selfie’ at sunset-point or can you in true sanity fight against the over-the-top taxi fares in Goa without actually having plan B?
Sadly, demand exceeds supply. Plain and simple. And now the new filter that almost singlehandedly decides the outcome of a vacation spot- how “insta-friendly” is that place? Did your male buddies ever ask that question, all we inquired was how far/close are the watering holes to the sun-kissed beaches, simple and uncomplicated.
But with women the worst unfolds when they say one and the same thing but with two different expressions–I love surprises! I love surprises but…. Ladies, do we men look like clairvoyants to you? When we surprised you with tickets to Goa, you showered us with kisses but when the sea got rough the garlic bread got hot and thinner women in sexy bikinis appeared from the sea, you suddenly hated the whole beach surprise. And yet we still insist on continuing the yin and yang tradition and plan our vacations with you contemplating the bliss that’s about to unfold-two lovebirds on a romantic getaway and even more thrilling if it’s on the back of a million compulsive lies to all and sundry be it the bosses, parents, colleagues and friends to finally land in paradise.
But are vacations with women really as blissful as they have been made out to be in the media or like ‘breaking news’ its just a ploy to sell? Just the way a toothache needs no statistic to prove its existence similarly no proof is required to prove that most of the times many a man would have loved to leave romance for bromance on these vacations.
And before your LGBT-friendly mind jumps to conclusions, well no- there is no altering of the man’s sexual-orientation but as my old colleague Aditya (25) pointed out on reaching Gokarna (beach town in Karnataka) with his girlfriend, romance suddenly looked like a 10 headed Ravana, he didn’t know which head to please. Tanya(24), his date, stumped him with infinite problems.
It started with the weather that was evidently hot humid and muggy and he somehow found himself accused for the same. Aditya had witnessed her packing 3 different kinds of sun-protection lotions and naughty bikinis, so it’s not that she was heading to Iceland and landed on the wrong side of the equator but complain, she did. Then it was his cardinal sin #2 – the motel. It wasn’t upto her standards. Aditya had shared the pictures of the motel with her and while both agreed, it was not exactly Burj-al-Khalifa’s country-cousin Tanya suggested that they would hardly be indoors. Matter closed.
No, and before he knew it he had already swiped his credit card and the motel gave way to a 5-star hotel and voila, Tanya’s frown gave way to a smile when she pointed to the sofa that matched the curtains and on how Instagram-friendly this place was and finally, wonder of wonders the hotel also had a swimming pool.
Imagine the unimaginable, leaving the Arabian Sea for a swimming pool. By now Aditya only wanted a chilled beer by the beach when Tanya excitedly pointed to the small fridge and a well-stocked mini-bar inside the room. Women, you have put us in a catch-22 situation.
Anand Sharma is a media professional, associated with leading names in the Indian TV industry for almost 18 years. He has worked with broadcasters like Star TV, Channel V & MTV India and for production houses like Miditech and Colosceum, to name a few. He specializes in Content creation in his parallel roles of Director, Creative Head and Writer (for TV production houses). His range of creative expression shifts seamlessly between tongue-in-cheek humour, emotionally-charged writings and stark satire. Some of his articles have been published on Bonobology.com, The Indian Express, connectedtoIndia.com and Little India.com. He has also written an audio-book for Storytel Originals, titled – “Tinderella in Jyotishland”.